what my girlfriends taught me in my 20s

Going through your twenties without good girl friends is like going on a road trip with a giant flat tire. I think your friends are your first true soul mates that teach you all about love and navigating your adulthood. As I’m entering my last year of my twenties soon, I feel eternally grateful for all my friendships. I wanted to write a lil love letter to my best friends since it’s valentine’s month and all. I grew up with some of these girls and am still growing every year with them. They have taught me so many important lessons and overall shaped who I am right now. I’m endlessly motivated and inspired by each of them and they add so much happiness/meaning to my life. Thank you, love you and I can’t wait for even more adventures to come each year.

Elayna ~ My built in best friend, thanks mom and dad, grew up side by side and seen every chapter. One of the greatest things my parents gave me is obviously my younger sister, one of my favourite people. I often call her my older, younger sister since she’s way taller, smarter and usually wiser. She definitely taught me having high self respect and self worth especially in dating and relationships. How to be a badass, smart, sensitive, mysterious type who’s a good listener and curates insane travels. This girl’s a straight A student, has two science degrees, works in software engineering and still balances a giant appetite for life. It’s been so refreshing being more best friends rather than room mates living together growing up and shedding childhood dynamics. Seriously the luckiest girl to have a go-to for similar music taste, shopping and beauty obsessions, food, travel and everything in between. I literally can’t wait to watch you get the most badass jobs, hit 30 countries by 30, and share a gazillion more roadtrips and adventures filled with good eats and lots of exploring.

Jen ~ It still feels like yesterday meeting on university campus and essentially being the few girls in our frosh for computer science! It’s been 11 years and counting for our amazing friendship which we both pour so much into. Bears isn’t a best friend but more like family and another sister or definitely a soul mate. Actually not kidding you, our parents come from the same province in China so isn’t that fate (cause they’re good friends too now). She has taught me the complex fine balance of chilling the fuck out while still working hard. To not get so angry, to not get so sad, to shift my perspective sometimes, to take a deep breath. Since it’s not that deep and life is precious filled with way more bright, goodness than dark. This girl is a ride or die type, always there for me, bubbly, genuine, fun, trusting, brilliant, gorgeous. I literally can’t wait to watch you accomplish more goals and I’m patiently waiting for that beach house. You know I will bury the body with you so I can’t wait for the next decade.

Lina ~ My reading, baking, runner extraordinaire who literally bakes me the most incredible creations and writes the best cards. I mean the best friends come in trios and there’s no better one than us three together. We’re also at 11 years now and counting which makes my heart super warm and grateful. I’m in constant awe at this girl too because she really gives off that it girl energy. She’s taught me so much about being independent, taking your goddamn time and doing before sharing. She is so strong and self sufficient in all aspects of life ~ work, relationships, interests, everything. I admire how amazing of a friend you are for all your people always caring and authentic. I get so motivated by your energetic drive for your career path or leveling up your hobbies like marathons or reading. I literally can’t wait to be cheering you on at the NYC marathon eventually and invest in your future bakery. I love our trio so much and honestly you and Jen together have helped me grow so much into me now.

Deet ~ I will never forget middle school summers biking to get dq instead of actually using our first official gym memberships. I can confidently say you’re my first soulmate and I knew that spending every second together, afternoons in art class. We like to call our friendship bi coastal long distance where we’ve each conquered our own respective cities like princesses. You got Van covered and I’m in Mtl both thriving living our parallel lives, same style different font for sure. She has taught me you only live once so chase your dreams and unleash that creativity. I mean we’re both such adventurous, creative girls full of different ideas and big, crazy dreams. She’s in her dream city working her dream job as an Aritzia architect living that west coast lifestyle ~ skateboarding, surfing, snowboarding, outdoors-ing. It gave me that fire to move to Mtl and relaunch my brand and keep on going to realize those dreams. I literally love you so much it hurts and I can’t wait to keep on facetiming every week until we’re 100. And cheer each other on as we accomplish everything we’ve dreamed of while we are still at heart those middle school girls, laughing in art class.

Claire ~ We have now known each other for solid 26 years and I can confidently say I have never met a harder worker! Claire is such a special special best friend since we grew up together and I mean that literally (semi detached town houses). I grew up with this girl 26 years, playing, biking, rollerblading, dancing, going to girl scouts and school bake sales and dances. I hold some of my most cherished memories from childhood and girlhood with this girl here and I love that. I have gone through basically every different version of myself with her in my life now and then vice versa. She is the most capricorn, hard working, academically bright person that I’ve met and she motivates me to work so hard and optimize my career. She sets her mind to something, and gets shit done, while always staying humble with a really good sense of dad humour. She’s an accomplished pharmacist who constantly chases challenges in her career path and pushes herself everyday. She’s also such a dork, always has good jokes, and shares amazing taste for all things pop culture and travel. I can’t wait for hopefully more Euro summers, staying at boutique hotels and curating cool shit with you every year. And continuing our tradition to watch the noms for Oscar best pictures every single goddamn year until our kids join.

Rach ~ We have also known each other for more than 10 years now and I love you endlessly my fiery girl. As you can see I really fucking cherish and nurture my friendships because they’re all long and full of substance. Rach has always been the fiery, bubbly girl who’s good at every sport and determined and headstrong with a clear path. She is super self-assured about what she wants to do and where she wants to go while always having fun, never a dull moment. She has taught me to optimize my own natural sense of self-assuredness and always keep going. She moved to London, England to complete her masters and realize those dreams of working as a sports therapist. She just moved back to Canada which I’m selfishly so grateful for cause that’s more time since she’s physically closer. She pivoted her career path with the greatest attitude and that really left a strong lasting impression ~ you can do anything. I literally can’t wait for more city breaks, and endless fun times with Claire bears included laughing til our stomachs hurt. I am so motivated by your self assuredness and how you always stay determined to meet your expectations and goals.

Nat ~ A girl who loves Tswift, cats, baking, reading and all things sweet and cosy like a really good London fog latte. I’m so grateful that Lina introduced you into my life cause you make it that much lighter, sweeter. I admire how kind you are to everyone that you care about, all friends and family. I love how close you are with your family and take the time to properly nurture every relationship. She has reminded me how precious family is and reignited my desire to create my own, in my own time. She is just the type of girl who’s the best friend, best daughter, best sister, best wifey and natural at it. She is so nurturing and thoughtful and sentimental and always there for good chats or treats. She has showed me that big yes to future cute forever home filled with a husband and animals and kids. I look up to your relationship with Johannes and love your love for your family/friends and obviously for me. I can’t wait for more cafe dates with Alfie and seeing you get everything that you deserve cause it’s the world!

Jiona ~ Another girl who is just such a badass in all life aspects especially style and career ~ such a big flex. I will never not want to be in a Kim sister sandwich with you and Lina because like how lucky! This girl (another capricorn) is so down to earth, with the best style, and the best music taste and honestly highly ambitious. You know I love my fellow city girls where we can frolick and share our same interests. She has taught my a little more to march to the beat of my own drum and own it too. She is so smart and hardworking and driven in her career path as a pediatric dietician (my friends are all career geniuses I know). She has the coolest personal style since we both share our love for vintage and a good thrift or two. She’s also effortlessly cool whether that’s her personality, her travels with friends or her rave alter ego. I literally can’t wait for more music festivals with you and drives to Trader Joe’s and ou manifesting Asia adventures. You always tell me you love my energy but I love yours more and especially your heart cause it’s so big!

Randy ~ One of the top best feelings in life is definitely moving to a new city and making good, genuine friends. Randy and I slid into each other’s dms which I fucking love cause there are good sides to the internet!! There’s truly nobody else I would rather run all over the city with to frolick and explore. Shared interests highly include: cafe hopping, vintage shopping, matcha a lot of it, and trying new restaurants (Mtl food scene’s blessed by the food gods). She has taught me how to be a mutli-faceted it girl cause we are complex and can be whoever. She’s a genius enginner yet also fashion creator balancing coding and tech with ootds and good taste. It serves a a great reminder that we’re such highly capable beings full of different dimensions. I also live the self dubbed Hannah Montana life by working in Hr and running Shy World and who said you can’t be killing both? I literally can’t wait for endless city adventures with you and eventually Mexico City? Europe trip? anywhere we’ll have fun. I love seeing you shine bright in your career path and continue to grow in the fashion world as well.

Jasmine ~ Oh my sweet Jasmine how I love you so much and you have truly made my move to Mtl everything. When I tell you that she was my realtor guys!! and we just clicked so well and are now best friends! I met her now two whole years ago when she showed me my first Mtl apartment and we became friends. She is also highly responsible along with my crazy manifesting for my current apartment which is my dream one. She is so kind, with the purest soul and has reminded me it’s never too late to start something new. She’s already an accomplished realtor in the city and went back to school to get her degree in health sciences. It makes so much sense because she’s such a giver and will be the best healthcare industry addition. I admire your dedication so much to everything whether that’s you career, or school, or family or friends or faith. I can’t wait to see you kill it in this new era and cheer you on. I’m also thinking of way more dinner parties, girls’ nights, pool dates and girl’s nights outs so long live potatoes <3

Moni ~ Oh the best feeling is making a really good friend then getting invited and introduced to the group like what?! I adore you Moni and all things you ~ your health and wellness, your secret party girl and zest for life. It’s been a joy getting to spend time the four of us the whole past year. Actually honoured to be included in the group and soak up all your and Jess’ wisdom. She has taught me to not compare to others and honour my own timeline cause everyone’s insanely unique. So get your shit together on all levels and just keep going and enjoy every single day. I am so excited for more girls nights where we’re yapping non-stop while sharing a bottle. I can’t wait to see what we stir up for this new year and get into together.

Jess ~ One of the sweetest, most empathetic, caring humans that I have met and I swear she has secret witch powers. I adore your energy and big sister advice along with your amazing I don’t give a fuck attitude. It’s been so fun soaking up the sun this year while chatting and swapping life stories with each other. Actually the wisest girl with so many good anecdotes whether that’s for dating/relationships or just life. She has taught me to keep standards high and have fun in between cause the universe has your back. So we’re all great people with the best circles so there’s no rush to add romantic pressure when we already have very full fulfilling cups. She has re amplified the idea that you future partner is simply a bonus and cherry on top, a want not need. She just has the most infectious, confident energy of life this is my life, these are my plans, so what? I literally can’t wait to make more mems us four and see you and George live happily ever after I mean!! I love love your big heart and energy for everyone and you have reminded me to be more confident/cool.

I love all of my family and friends endlessly in every universe, I will choose you. And to my girlfriends thank you for being exactly who you are and literally shaping me <3